( Dream: when approx 13-14 years old )
The Worm
I am holding a glass filled with clear water.
Inside it, at the bottom of the glass there is a light,
baby pink, small worm trying to come up to the surface.
When it comes up i push it back down
to the bottom of the glass with my index finger
and as i do so it starts to cry like a helpless little baby
"Ooaaaa!....ooaaaaa!....ooaaaa!..."
After a few moments it stops crying and starts trying
all over again and the process is repeated several times:
It comes up to the surface and i push it down
it cries and then it tries again and again...
and every time, i keep pushing it back down.
..................
I find the whole thing quite curious...
A helpless little worm that cries like a baby
urged by a blind impulse to come up to the surface
and it tries repeatedly.
There are no feelings of malice, fear or deliberation
on my part as i push it down - just an equally blind impulse
to do so, while from some neutral part of myself
I 'm observing both 'it' and myself impassively.
...................
And the worm came to the surface
and brought consciousness, knowledge and pain.
Knowledge in some instances is not enough to overcome pain
so the worm was pushed back down again.
I can still hear it crying from time to time...
Alter Ego
